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Things that SOUND dirty but aren’t

by George Serradinho on May 20, 2009



I just got this in an email and thought of sharing it. Some of the things are really funny and I can see why they would be considered to SOUND dirty, but they aren’t. The three categories that have covered are in a law firm, in the office and playing golf.

Read on and let me know what you think. Even some of them I have said and it never occurred to me that it sounded dirty.

TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN A LAW FIRM, ARE NOT:

Lawyer10. Have you looked through her briefs?
9. He is one hard judge.
8. Counsellor, let’s do it in chambers.
7. Her attorney withdrew at the last minute.
6. Is it a penal offence?
5. Better leave the handcuffs on.
4. For $200 an hour, she better be good!
3. Can you get him to drop his suit?
2. The judge gave her the stiffest one he could.

And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty but in law isn’t
1. Think you can get me off?

TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN THE OFFICE, ARE NOT:

Office10. I need to whip it out by 5.
9. Mind if I use your laptop?
8. Just stick it in my box.
7. If I have to lick one more, I’ll gag!
6. I want it on my desk, NOW!!!!!
5. HMMMMM, I think it’s out of fluid!
4. My equipment is so old; it takes forever to finish.
3. It’s an entry-level position.
2. When do you think you’ll be getting off today?

And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty but at the office isn’t
1. It’s not fair. I do all the work while he just sits there!!!

TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN GOLF, ARE NOT:

Golf Cart10. Damn, my shaft is bent.
9. After 18 holes, I can barely walk.
8. You really whacked the hell out of that sucker.
7. Look at the size of his putter.
6. Keep your head down and spread your legs a bit more.
5. Mind if I join your threesome?
4. Stand with your back turned and drop it.
3. My hands are so sweaty I can’t get a good grip!
2. Nice stroke, but your follow-through leaves a lot to be desired.

And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty but in golf isn’t
1. Hold up! I need to wash my balls first!

So, how were they? Did you laugh? Come on, be serious now. Let me know what you think.

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Author Information

Article by George Serradinho

I am the proud owner of Serradinho and have made this my second home. I'm into blogging, downloads, WordPress and the internet in general. I also love meeting and helping others and learning new techniques.

{ 18 comments }

1 Curious Little Person May 20, 2009 at 7:58 pm

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ha ha .. good one…enjoying this one

Cheers
Sandeep

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2 George Serradinho May 21, 2009 at 4:24 am

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@Curious Little Person – I’m glad you liked it.

3 Pradeep May 21, 2009 at 4:29 am

he he .. dirty .. funny..
You really have a nice theme for your blog. I really like the design. Great.
And ya thanks for the leaving suggestions for my blog. I appreciate that.
Cheers
Pradeep from Bloggeruser

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4 George Serradinho May 21, 2009 at 4:33 am

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@Pradeep – Not a problem. I like your blog too, I just surf and read/comment where I can. Keep up the great work :)

5 Ricky May 21, 2009 at 9:15 am

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George
You dirty mind ;-) .I enjoyed it a lot.

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6 Maria@Conversations with Moms May 21, 2009 at 3:46 pm

LOL. I loved it. I love the getting off in both the law and office themes.

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7 George Serradinho May 21, 2009 at 4:23 pm

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@Maria – you make me laugh. I hope your husband is doing better?

8 Tycoon Blogger May 22, 2009 at 11:09 pm

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very funny post, thanks for sharing. I especially like the golf references. I will share this with my golf buddies this weekend.

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9 Harsh Agrawal May 23, 2009 at 12:26 am

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George coming up with lots of humor these days.. Specially after boobs oh I mean iBoobs post :)

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10 Curious Little Person May 24, 2009 at 6:13 pm

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Up with the thesis theme finally, good stuff

Cheers
Sandeep

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11 George Serradinho May 24, 2009 at 6:43 pm

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@Curious Little Person – trying my best to get things in order. I still have lots to do to get it where I want it :)

12 Nihar May 26, 2009 at 12:54 pm

LOL,

It was good. Good one after iBOOB joke :)

Will wait for more from you…

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13 Deneil Merritt June 3, 2009 at 10:32 am

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Hold up! I need to wash my balls first! OMG, that one got me. LMAO! I was sitting here reading them until I got to the last one. Keep em coming, I love your joke posts.

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14 George Serradinho June 3, 2009 at 10:40 am

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@Deneil – glad to hear you liked them. I get loads of email jokes, but will only post the good ones :)

15 Deneil Merritt June 3, 2009 at 11:16 am

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Well I hope those jokes keep coming. A laugh is the best way to start the day.

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16 Raj November 17, 2009 at 8:22 pm

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ha ha ha, Thats so funny, really enjoyed it !!!
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17 George Serradinho November 17, 2009 at 8:52 pm

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@Raj – glad you liked it, many seem to have had a good laugh.

18 Richard November 20, 2009 at 3:33 am

I love the golf ones especially “Keep your head down and spread your legs a bit more.” I always here golf instructors saying something like this and think they have the best jobs going!
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